Imperfect Chance

I feel awaking anguish building from an
sleeping slumber
consuming my emotions, Who am I? Lord.
No human bears this cross I burden on my lustful way
No path is laid before the land so no choices are revealed who thee
my be; gone transparent  to the eye of the animal instinct

mistress left for a goldmine seeking external greed focusing wealth
will dismissing over cometh years but the scare I bear deepening into brown skin
I wonder  would revenging the emotion reck I am